9/11

I was at home with my mother, my two-year old son and one-year old daughter.  I was recently unemployed and newly separated.  It was a tough day.  My mom was watching the kids while I racked my brain and tried to figure out how I would pay for my mortgage, my car, my bills, groceries and everything else two toddlers would need.  Then we got the call.  We immediately turned on the TV and the images left us speechless.  I remember vividly how the children, so young and unaware, kept playing around us while my mother and I could only watch in stunned horror.

My family immigrated to the United States via New York City.  We grew up in the Upper West Side.  We lived there for 14 years and it was our home until we moved to the South.  But having grown up in New York made us New Yorkers.  We didn’t believe we were immigrants, didn’t feel like we were immigrants - we were from New York.  And, as everyone knows, New York is a state of mind.  So that was us.  Being raised in New York meant that our roots, our friends, family and our hearts were still there.  When the cowards hit 'our' towers, it was as if they had bombed one of our homes.  We were directly impacted.  Fortunately for us, none of our friends or family members were hurt or died during the bombings.  But so many others were.  Thousands.  And our hearts ached.  We could not feel anything other than we were part of this catastrophe.  Experiencing the disaster from a distance didn’t spare us from the grief.  For days we were like zombies.  The pictures of the devastation running over and over in our minds. It was all anyone could discuss in sadness and disbelief.  We prayed and watched the news and reports incessantly.  We marveled upon hearing the side stories of near misses – the employee who woke up late and didn’t take his regular train, the flight attendant who switched routes with another at the last minute, the heroic efforts of so many police officers and firefighters.  This event forever changed the lives of so many in New York City and around this country.  The unity felt during those days was palpable.  We all felt like New Yorkers.  We all felt like Americans.

Today I remember all the beautiful souls who died in 9/11.  And I give thanks for their lives, each of their names, and their legacy.  We will never forget.